When friends go to a different school (Story of Danni)



Danni and me last year in marching band...good memories(:

 Some of us have experienced this and it can be a hard thing to overcome or forget but honestly, who wants to forget?!  But this post is basically just about my experience with this topic.  On August 27, 2010, I met a very wonderful person, one of my dearest friends, Danni.  I believe that she came into my life for a purpose, as if God sent me her for her to teach me something.  My understanding of it is that she had to teach me that I was worth something, that I actually am important even if I don’t think I am.  She got me to stop doing some of the bad things I was involved in and it’s a really good thing because, well I’m living still, aren’t I?  Well the problem is that next school year she will be transferring to a different school, a brilliant school that can further her in her future plans, and I won’t really have the time to see her.  It’s was hard to accept the truth that I may never see her again and I’m still faced with this fact, but I know that true friendship never ends and that if we truly want to see each other again, then it will happen.  I know God sent her to me and I am very thankful for Him to give me the chance to meet her.  

My Nightmare

So Friday night of last week, I had a terrifying nightmare, it was so INSANE!!!  Previous to me going to sleep, I had decided to watch this movie call The Battle of Los Angeles.  I didn’t really find it all that interesting because it  wasn’t my type of movie, I mean don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t bad but I prefer horror movies instead.  Well when I went to sleep and exactly before I woke up (there I go being captain obvious again), I had this insane and terrifying nightmare as I mentioned in the first line of this.  To start off this nightmare, I was hanging out with my friends Amber and Chassidy while they were on their date, why I was just chilling with them while on a date, I have no idea.  But then they start ignoring me and I got really sad so I just decided to walk away.  All of a sudden I could hear panic and screaming coming from the restaurant as if someone was dying and of course they were, so I ran into this old run down shack and when I got in there, Amber was there laying on the floor crying, how she got there, I don’t know, but she said Chassidy got EATEN BY ALIENS and this is when the nightmare truly began to show.  Then this freaking Asian dude walks in wearing a dinosaur mask and I’m just thinking WTF?!?  Well he decided to sit on a chair while I hid underneath the bench and Amber was still lying there on the floor.  We suddenly hear weird noises and walking outside of the shack and then the door opens and in comes this alien thing and it scared the heck out of me!  Well then it killed Amber and I don’t know why in your dreams your best friend can die, but you cannot and I was just horrible.  So I tried my best to get closer to the wall hoping it wouldn’t see me but to my luck, it did.  He didn’t seem to mind the Asian dude because he was wearing a freaking dinosaur mask, how weird, but before I could be consumed by this alien-like creature, the scene changed and I was now at my dad’s house.  There was this guy just sitting there on my bed but he took out this weird looking gun and tried to kill me so I then realized he was a disguised alien so I ran outside and all of a sudden it started raining.  So I decided to run along our fence to get to the opening so I can run into my neighbor’s yard.  To my surprise, when I got there THE SWAT TEAM WAS THERE!!  Oh my freaking goodness, how INSANE!  Anyways, I explain to them my situation but then they turn out to be aliens!  WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME?!?  Well before they ate me I awoke from this terrifying nightmare of mine and my friend Danni told me to write it down for a story but I decided to blog it instead.

Drama

Hahaha, I know I shouldn’t laugh about this thought, but it’s just that this is probably the only thing I will ever write about that EVERYONE can relate to.  Drama, why is a part of everyday life?  I guess it’s because….well *thinks* because basically the person causing the drama has no life and they just want attention.  That tis my opinion on why it’s involved in everyday life.  Drama can be simply just someone talking about others such as spreading rumors and in high school, you go through that stuff all the time.  That’s basically because in high school you have teenagers (yes I know I’m Captain Obvious) and teenagers are the main people that drama revolves around.  But don’t get me wrong, adults can have drama too.  Working people deal with their co-workers, elderly people can have drama in nursing homes such as….maybe two old women fighting about another old guy that’s “hot” in their opinion, lol, I don’t know but I assure you that they still have drama, and of course younger kids have drama such as fighting over a crayon or who gets to sit on Santa’s lap first.  Wow, thinking back to my childhood, I can’t believe how awesome it actually was, how innocent we are as children.  How much I would love to have the drama I had when I was younger.  Back when we didn’t even fully comprehend what the word ugly meant, how I would die to go back to then.  But I have to realize, we all have to realize that that will never happen again, that our childhood is gone and when we turn into teenagers we are exposed to the world and the ugly truth of everyday life.

Breath Only For Today

Have you ever heard the saying “The past is history, the future is a mystery, and today is a gift.  That is why we call it the present”?  Well I tend to ponder about this saying a lot although many of us don’t really think about it that often or we don’t follow what its saying. 

“The past is history” Of course it tis but don’t we always look back upon it?  We don’t always need to be doing this because it can bring back bad memories that can bring you down.  The only reason we need to look back is to learn from our mistakes, to make sure that our faults don’t happen again.  Everyone tends to live there though, always referring to it and digging old experiences back up.  How can you expect to live for today, to be everything you are now, if you’re still dwelling in the past?

“The future is a mystery” We never know what tis going to happen to us, we have absolutely no idea, the only person who knows is God.  God has everything planned out for you, He knows what’s going to happen whether you believe it or not.  The future can be a surprise to you but you have to be ready for it.

“Today is a gift.  That’s why we call it the present” Isn’t it joyous just to hear that today is a gift, a present from God?  We never know what’s going to happen, when we’re going to die so that’s why it’s a present, it’s your gift of life, just to be alive today, alive yet another day.  Love what the day brings you each and every day for what happens was meant to happen, you have to believe that.

Friend Arguments

Why is it that friends ALWAYS fight?  Most of the time it’s over the most pathetic things imaginable.  Such things include, but are very limited to:  DRAMA (that seems to be the biggest thing), opinions, boys/girls, and past arguments (this is the one I find completely funny in a way because it’s totally just stupid).  Eventually the argument goes away and is forgotten, well that tis if you’re truly friends and don’t let things get to you.  But in the meantime, you feel like you’ve ruined everything by getting involved in the argument instead of being a passive person; that your friend could never like you again because you continuously hurt them, or maybe that’s how your friend feels.  I’m sort of in this position a lot.  I tend to get into arguments with my closest friends and after we’ve stopped the fight and started ignoring each other, that’s how I feel:  like they could never possibly like me again and that I screwed things up…typical.  Well, I was sitting here last week awaiting a phone call or at least a text message from my friend apologizing for freaking out because of the situation.  The situation, the argument, is that I was withholding information, my opinion, so I don’t hurt her, this fact she is well aware of yet she insist that I tell her but I refused to do so.   But like I previously said, why oh why do people argue over the most pathetic things?  Wouldn’t it be better if friends didn’t fight, well it would be better if no one fought but that’s clearly never going to happen because everyone has their own thoughts, their own opinions.  I just wish that it didn’t even exist, that’s my thought.

Same-Sex Marriage

Okay, as we all know, there is a big controversy over whether or not GLBT’s are allowed to get married or not.  The Christian faith is separated on this as well.  Although many think that it tis sinful, there are also many out there who are neutral and others who see it as morally acceptable.  As a Christian, I feel that it tis wrong to judge others who have a different sexuality other than heterosexual.  I admit that I am bisexual and I have been now for about 3 years but only for about a year have I been open about it.  The reason why is because there are people, MANY people, who feel it necessary to judge and insult those who are different, those that like the same gender, but honestly, I just find that horrid.  “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” (Declaration of Independence).

This quote, this very meaningful quote that our founding fathers wrote, is a strong reason to allow gay marriage.  Yes, we’re all created equal and we have the right to be happy.  Why can’t people just see that homosexuals are happy with the people they love?  I can compare this to the fight, the struggle for blacks to gain their freedom.  The GLBT community is trying to gain their freedom, their rights, just like African Americans did.  My friend Brooke once told me, “Love is love no matter what and if it’s true love, they’ll fight to keep it.”  Let me ask this question:  If you were deeply in love with someone and the country, the world, told you that you weren’t allowed to be with that person, how would you feel?  You’ll feel heartbroken; you’ll feel the need to fight for your love.  That’s how homosexuals feel.  Our country doesn’t see the matter how we do.  The majority of the country sees it as a sinful act towards God, but that’s not how we see it, we see it as our fight to have the right to love, to be with the person we want to spend forever with, just to have the same rights as everyone else.  I asked my friend Chassidy who is dating my best friend, “How do you feel about same-sex relationships?” and she replied with, “I’m fine with them because the love of my life is gay.”  See, by not allowing same-sex marriage, they’re keeping people who love each other from being official, from saying the words “I do.”  Now I asked my best friend, Amber, “What would you say to people who judge homosexuality?” and she answered, “I’d tell them it’s my life and I’ll live it the way I want.”  So to elaborate on what Amber said, I would like to add that people are in charge of their own lives and no one should tell them how to run it.  In my opinion, I see nothing wrong with same-sex marriage because it’s not harming anyone.  Just let love happen, allow for same-sex marriage because I’m here fighting for it and so are many other people, some who are even heterosexual.

Depression & Suicide

I know the problem is out there, that it still exists, and that it always will no matter how much we try to avoid it, how much we try to put a kibosh to it.  The fact is that not everyone is loved like they should be and that some people need to be loved more than others.  The majority of people who commit suicide are often faced with depression and most of the time it’s not treated, although it should be.  Depression is a serious issue that needs to be faced, without help things can get worse and eventually lead to taking one’s own life.  Sometimes the world seems like it’s too much to handle, like everything you do is wrong and nothing really matters.  The person just feels like they don’t belong anywhere, that they aren’t accepted in this world, that dying is the best and only thing they can do.  What these people don’t realize is that people actually do love them, that no matter how bad something seems, things will eventually get better, they always do.  These people need to be told how much they’re accepted and how much they’re loved before it’s too late.  Isn’t it better to say how much you love the person while they’re alive and letting them know instead of acknowledging these details at their funeral when it doesn’t really matter that much anymore?  The answer is of course it tis.  So if you know anyone who has any signs of depression, just show them that you care, love them, and make them happy before they end up doing something about their pains.  I’m only speaking about this because it runs across my thought chain a lot.  I have admittedly tried to commit suicide many times before although many people don’t know that and I do suffer from depression.  Even though I say I will kill myself sometimes, I guess I truly don’t mean it.  The only reason why I don’t is because I realize now that my friends love me, God loves me, and I don’t want to hurt the people that love me, the people that I love.  I would say the person that means the most to me now is my best friend Amber.  She’s helped me through my worst moments recently and I thank her for that.  She doesn’t give up when everyone else does, and she understands me for the most part for who I truly am.  If only the others suffering from depression had someone as fabulous as her, then I now they would change their minds.  I believe that if everyone cared as much as she did, then the world would actually be a better place.  But the point is that depression and suicide should be thought about more often in society.  We should do our best to help those who suffer from depression to prevent them from committing suicide.  Every 16 minutes someone kills themselves, we need to put a stop to this.

Why? That's the question.

Why do we all strive to be the same as everyone else, to wear the same clothes, to do the same things, or to act the same as others?  Is it simply to gain the attention of others or to just basically fit in?  Why don’t we just be different, just be ourselves?  Isn’t that the whole point of having different activities, different hobbies, and different styles of fashion?  The point is that we’re all different.  God created us all in his own image and it tis for certain that he didn’t create us all the same.  He made us different so that we can all accomplish different things, things that he made us to create and accomplish.  If this is true, then why, why do we mimic each other?  We’re all different so shouldn’t we act like it?  We need to go out and be ourselves, to be the person that God wants us to be, not who others wants us to be.  So to answer my question:  why do we all strive to be the same as everyone else, I would say it’s so that we don’t get judged, so that we can make friends, and/or so we can just go a long with the crowd because we’re afraid of expressing our own ideas.  My call to action is to just be yourself, it doesn’t matter what others think or what they say, it’s what you think, what God thinks.  Just be yourself no matter what.